Posts Tagged ‘sperm’

Our new plan

November 12, 2009

Wow, it has been 5 months since my last update.  As you might recall, we had a negative on our pregnancy test after our 1st IVF round.  We regrouped and decided to just let things settle down a bit.  During that time we bought some really expensive ovulation monitors and figured we would give it a go ourselves until we decided if we wanted to do IVF again.

The monitors proved to be ineffective.  Apparently my wife has such low levels of hormones that the monitors couldn’t pick up when she was ovulating.  We went 2 months with not a single increase in levels that we figured the machine was broken.  We sent it in for testing and they confirmed that she had the smallest of increases of hormone levels but not enough for the machine to pick up.  She went in for blood work and ovulation was confirmed for the 1st month, damn, we missed another opportunity.  The 2nd month she didn’t ovulate at all.  WTF?  Her body is all messed up at this point.

She decided to go to a hormone therapist as well as a accupuncturist.  These weekly trips had her full of holes and eating her weight in pills, vitamins, and nasty powders you mix into water.  She had to spit in a test tube every 2 days and freeze it and then send it in for testing.  All this crazy stuff, and all I have to do is ejaculate into a cup.  Doesn’t quite seem fair if you ask me.

Last month we figured we would just try ourselves again and on the 35th day, she still hadn’t gotten her period.  Of course we got excited, but all HPTs showed negative.  Turns out once again she hadn’t ovulated.  This is turning into a disaster.  I mean, I get if the powers that be don’t want it to work for whatever reason, but at least give us all the tools to try and play the game.  It isn’t fair if she is broken 1/2 the time.

Anyways, we tried again in October and today is actually the 30th day of her 30 day cycle with some slight cramping but no break-through bleeding.  Who knows, maybe we got lucky this month, or maybe again she didn’t ovulate.  We will know in a few days I suppose.

In the meantime we have sought a new fertility doctor in Tampa.  He apparently is one of the best in the country (aren’t they all?) but works at a teaching hospital, so he should have all the latest and greatest stuff at his disposal.  I’ll keep you informed how that goes.  We are looking at a January IVF date if the natural method doesn’t pan out until then.



June 26, 2009

Wife went in for beta blood work today at 7:45am.  We got the call from the Dr at 1:30pm that we are NOT pregnant.  Guess those two, healthy, beautiful embroys decided they didn’t want to stick around for 9 months.  Well, we are obviously very upset, but I kinda had a feeling.  She was cramping and spotting, and the home pregnancy tests kept coming up negative.

Well, now it is time to regroup and see if we try this game again, or something different.

T Minus 4 days…

June 22, 2009

We go in for our Beta this Friday and we are super nervous.  Her OHSS is totally cured, the swelling went down and she is feeling great.  Our main concern is that she has been getting cramps.  These are similar to what she gets when she starts her priod.  Today, 8 days post transfer, she had some slight spotting.  She panicked and consulted a friend who underwent IVF.  It is crazy all the different answers you get to yoru questions.  Some people say cramping is normal and a good sign (embryo implanting).  Some say spotting is a good sign.  Others report it is just the onset of their period. 

I guess there is no right or wrong answer, since every woman, and every situation is different.  Waiting has got to be the hardest part.  Not nearly as hard as getting a negative, but still hard.  Just a few more days to find out what is going on in there.  Wish us luck.

What do porn, eggs and sprite have in common?

June 9, 2009

So today is the big day.  Well one of many perhaps.  Today was the day that my wife had to have her eggs aspirated.  We arrived at the Doctors office at 7:45am for our procedure.  Now I have been to many doctors offices in my time, but I have to tell you, this place was run like a well oiled machine.  The second we walked in, they had paperwork for us to sign, had a room for us to wait in and had nurse after nurse come in asking questions.  The setup is basically this:

1) The take wifey into a room and have her undress, everything comes off, no jewelry, nothing
2) They bring her back to her bed and give her an IV and start a saline drip
3) They hook up every machine that beeps, bings, and makes noises to her to check her heart, temperature, whether she gets DirectTv, etc.
4) They wheel her away to the OR where they put her out, aspirate the egg and bring her to recovery
5) They have me go to a room and produce my sample
6) I meet her back in recovery and wait for the drugs to wear off and take her home.

So wifey gets undressed and I fill out paperwork, answer questions, etc.  She comes back and has everything off but her bra.  The make nurse scolds her.  Bad wifey, bad!  The only reason she kept it on is because with all the meds, her breasts are super duper tender and it hurts to have the material of the gown on them.  She comes back and lays back down.

10,000 questions and forms later they are ready to walk her to the OR.  I am told to wait in the lobby and follow orders, like a good soldier.  About 30 minutes later somebody comes out and gets me, leads me to the room to jerkoff and leave my deposit.  This room is always a little creepy.  I mean, you know about 500 guys have masturbated in there, and they have porn playing on the TV, nude magazines, etc.  It is uncomfortable because the nurse is a woman, so you know she is like, hmmm, wonder what porno this dude is into.  To make matters worse, I brought a bookbag with me with my laptop and other things so I could do work while I waited for my wife.  They probably thought I brought my own sick porn with me.  Then of course when you are done depositing the sample you wonder if you should just ring the bell to come out, or wait like 10 minutes to make it seem like it took you a long time.  I split the difference and waited 5 minutes after I was done.  I wanted to see how the porno ended.  Did she actually pay for the pizza?

I go back to the waiting room and wait, watching a little morning TV.  The Dr comes out and greets me, tells me she is out of surgery, and he got 19 eggs.  19.  Holy shit!  That sounds amazing.  I am ready to enter the Guiness book of records, until he tells me the record at their clinic is in the 50+ range.  Damn!  It isn’t the quantity it is the quality right?  But still 19 eggs is freaking amazing!  They lead me back to see my wife who is knocked out.

This is the fun time when all she says is jumbled jargon and you can tease her and she’ll never know, or at least she won’t remember.  She wasn’t out too long, maybe 20 minutes and she started to come around.  She was feeling pretty good, but the nurse wanted her to go pee before he could let her go.  I guess they need to make sure you can pass the liquid saline before they let you go.  Well she is in the bathroom for 10 minutes and it just aint happening.  She tried all the tricks, but she didn’t get so much as a drop.

They brought her back into the recovery room and increased her fluids and brought her a can of Sprite.  She hates sprite.  I drank it, yummy!  $13,000 Sprite!  She went through an entire new bag of IV juice until she felt the urge to try again.  Success!  She has never been happier to pee in her life.  It meant we got to go home.  Apparently we were the last people still around and left at 11:45am.

When we got home, she took some Tylenol with Codeine and had a light meal.  She was very happy, alert and had energy.  Just a slight discomfort, similar to menstral cramps, or gas, but nothing she couldn’t take, she is a woman after all, strong pain threshold.  She was feeling so well she sent me back to work.  I took the dogs with me and headed to the office.  Yes we own our own business and the dogs are with us daily.

So far everything seems perfect.  Her eggs were plentiful, they said my specimen was great and tommorow they call us to let us know how things are progressing.  We will either have them put back in Friday or Sunday, depending on how they are doing.  We heard conflicting information.  Some people say you want day 5, the dr office said they have a better success rate with day 3.  We are gunning for twins if possible, but will be thrilled with anything.

More in a few days as we start to get results back in.  Wish us luck!

Is that a blue dot on your butt?

June 8, 2009

Wifey went to the Dr on Thursday and they told her she had over 15 follicles.  They gave her all the measurements but of course she didn’t write them down, and honestly we don’t care as long as there are some good eggs in there.  They told her, her estrogen was out of control and for us to cut back our injections from a dosage of 150 to 75 on Friday and Saturday and for her to come into the office on Sunday.

All this week she has been feeling bloated.  Her ovaries are about to explode.  It isn’t so much as pain she says, but just a full or conspitated feeling.  She was so uncomfortable that I had to do a manual release on Friday as per Doctors orders with no help from my mate 😦  There is nothing worse than heading to the bathroom to take care of business and coming back to your wife saying, wow, that was pretty quick.  I guess my bruised ego isn’t as bad as all the shots she has to take, which still have had no side-effects.

So on Sunday, she goes to the Dr and they take a look inside and were pleasantly surprised.  She is doing great, and they told her to take the trigger shot at 9pm that same day, but rather than 2ccs, to take 1cc since she has so much estrogen.  This is the needle she has been fearing.  It is 1 1/2 inches long and a 18 gauge and goes right into the rump, right in the muscle.  She has really been scared about this shot, and I have been nervous because it is so big, and the timing is critical.

About 30 minutes before the shot, I did all the preparation, mixed it all up, etc.  I went into the bedroom and prepared the area.  Turned on lights so I could see what I was doing, studied the diagram of where to put the shot from the Doctors office, and psyched myself up.  I called me wife in 5 minutes before the shot and had her lay on her tummy on the bed.  I looked on her tushy and I saw this little blue dot on her butt, exactly where I was going to do the injection.  The backstory of this dot is that as a child, my wifes sister was chasing her with a super sharp pencil and when they collided the lead or graphite from the pencil embedded itself in her butt.  The dot has never gone away, and it just so happens it was in the exact right spot.  I thought of it as a sign, a positive one.  It almost brought me to tears.

Anyway, she lay on her belly and I took an ice pack and applied it to the blue dot for 5 minutes.  When the clock struck 9pm, I took off the ice pack, rubbed some alcohol on the area, closed my eyes (kinda sorta) and pushed that needle down, what I thought was hard.  What they don’t prepare you for is that skin is freaking thick, and it takes a lot of force to get a needle in there, and muscle is tough, so you gotta really work hard at it if you don’t jab it in all the way the first time.  I looked up at her and asked if she was ok.  She didn’t even flinch.  “Did you inject it yet” she asked.  Wow!! She didn’t even feel the needle prick, due to her tottally numb ass.  I got the entire needle in, drew back to check for blood, and injected away.  Pulled the needle out, and gave her a kiss.  Yes, on the blue dot 🙂  She never felt a thing.  The entire fear of this super long needle was for naught.

We head to the Dr tommorow at 7:45am for extraction and my specimen.  Wish us luck, hope we get some good eggies out of this.

Smack that Ass

June 5, 2009

Before we started this whole IVF journey we kept hearing how awful the injections were.  Everything from the pain of the actual injection to the effects of the drugs.  I had nightmares of my wife running after me with kitchen shears because of her awful cramps or snapping at me in the blink of an eye.

Well I am still here and alive, and honestly, it has been pretty tame.  She had a few days where her head hurt a bit, but that is pretty status quo for the two of us.  Beyond that, not too bad.  However, the last two days she said her ovaries are hurting, and she will occassionaly get a sharp cramp for a split second.

She went to the doctor on Monday and he took a look inside and said her eggs need more time to grow.  Yesterday she went in for a pre-op appointment, where they basically make you sign your life away. And tommorow at 7am she goes in for another round of blood work and a peek inside to see if we are ready to extract.

We both started taking mandated antibiotics, and my only advice there is take on a full stomach or you’ll be sorry 🙂  Tommorow I have to, umm, relieve myself, according to the Doctor.  I am sure he said it more doctor like, but basically I have to clear the tubes so to speak.  Hopefully it won’t be a solo affair, we will have to see.

If all goes according to plan, we do the trigger shot on Saturday, but more liklely it will be a few extra days if her eggs don’t cooperate.  That is the part she is most worried about as the needles for all the other shots are babies, but this trigger and subsequent progesterone looks like you could take a core sample with the thing.  It is a beast, and goes all the way in the butt.   Wish us luck 🙂

Drinking my Way to More Sperm

May 3, 2009

Yeah I know the title sounds kinda, hmm, nasty to say the least.  I was watching FitTV the other night and a program came on called “The Truth About Food: How to be Sexy” in which they did all these food experiments.  The same sizes were very small,  less than 18 people in most cases, but the results were pretty interesting.  They took a group of men with low sperm counts and high numbers of damaged sperm and made them drink fruit smoothies two times a day for 3 months in an effort to improve the quality and quantity of their sperm.

The results showed that in a portion of the men, it actually did increase their sperm count, but more interesting was the fact that in all the men it improved the DNA of the sperm.  That is to say, the sperm was healthier.  I found that pretty interesting.

Even though my sperm count and health of my sperm is off the charts good, like my sperm could be the poster child of the year, I could win an award in fact they are soo good, I figured what could it hurt to have a few smoothies.  If nothing else, I would lose some weight.  So I went to the market today and bought a bunch of fruits.  Kiwi, bananna, pears, mangos, etc.  I chopped them all up, added some milk and whirred my way to fruit smoothie goodness.  It actually tasted quite nice, and on a hot Florida afternoon really hit the spot. 

I highly suggest you do some research for yourself and see if making a couple of milkshakes can help you on your path the parental bliss.